


To Catch without Intent

by oceankat8



Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, Marvel (Comics), Moon Knight (Comics)
Genre: Accidental Proposal, Alternate Universe, M/M, Misunderstandings, Monster World, Pre-Slash, Shovel Talk, Spider mention, Vampire mention, Zombie Mention, all the super heroes are supernatural creatures, corpse mention, halloween fic, in case any of that squiks you
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-31
Updated: 2020-10-31
Packaged: 2021-03-08 17:27:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27300439
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oceankat8/pseuds/oceankat8
Summary: Wade is used to messing everything up, but a chance encounter with a supernatural spin has him hoping he didn't mess up this one too bad.
Relationships: Marc Spector/Wade Wilson
Comments: 3
Kudos: 28





	To Catch without Intent

Wade loved visiting New York these days, especially since he’d been nudging himself ever so gently into the super awesome superhero business. Sure, he wasn’t the most popular guy around. Hard to be when he didn’t really hesitate to kill people and talked to voices that other people couldn’t hear and spoke in a way that had everyone rolling their eyes and calling him crazy. Also the whole smelling like a corpse thing…

It was a lonely existence.

But Wade never let that get him down for too long. Honestly nothing could get him down for too long, and they’d tried everything. And then some. It was extremely hard to kill something like him; a corpse stitched back together and given a life he never asked for and that he couldn’t seem to get rid of no matter how hard he tried. A proper Frankenstein’s monster meets the unkillable blob.

So he focused on the little things, like how nice Daredevil’s ass looked in his tight red suit and how if he wanted to keep his head he needed to keep moving because Frank didn’t like him on the best of days and if he caught him ogling everyone’s favorite Vamp, it wouldn’t be a pleasant few days for anyone.

So Wade allowed himself to swing along the buildings like everyone’s favorite spider themed vigilante with way too many eyes, -that most people found disturbing but honestly was just adorable- smashing face first into building after building because he couldn’t quite get any of the angles right with his grappling hook. Wade crawled up painfully onto the roof of the building he’d just planted into the side of and sighed.

Batman made it seem so easy in his comics. 

There was the sound of fighting a couple of blocks down. Wade rushed over there, eager to help whichever hero he could catch and prove to them that he was good now, see? He helped people, they didn’t have to run away screaming at the sight of him.

It was Moony, his slick white cloak wrapped around him and shimmering in the moonlight as he fought, rough and dirty. Blood sprayed everywhere and somehow not a single drop landed on the pristine white. Wade stopped for a moment to take in the sight. Watching Moon Knight fight was a rare treat, despite his rather “discreet” garb. It was difficult to spot him in the city. Though it was more common on full moons like tonight.

Wade jumped down to join the fight, breaking both legs in a loud _snap_ that drew Moony’s assailants towards him. Wade smiled and gave him a thumbs up, only for Moon Knight to roll his eerie, glowing eyes and continue fighting. He didn’t say Wade couldn’t help though, so he let his legs heal and drew one of his katanas from his back, joining in the fight.

“So Moony, who are these guys anyways?” Wade figured he’d try and engage in conversation. That was often the case. He’d talk, they’d tell him to shut up, he’d keep talking.

“They are cultists, seeking the light of the Moon for their dark, twisted ways. Khonshu has demanded I cease their actions and repair the damage done to his image.” Moon Knight’s voice was low and soft, with a touch of gravel as if he wasn’t quite comfortable using it. Wade definitely didn’t have any fantasies forming in his head right this moment about it even a little bit because he was a respectful, professional superhero.

“I love the sound of your voice.” And that was a respectful, professional compliment and not weird at all.

Moon Knight threw a cultist at him instead of responding and Wade cut him down, stepping a bit closer to his newest partner in un-crime. That’s when he noticed one of them catch Moony off guard and grab the cloak off his shoulders.

The change was instantaneous, and Wade almost missed it by blinking in shock. Sure, it wasn’t like he’d spent a lot of time with Moon Knight, and he actually didn’t know what manner of night creature he was (it wasn’t like Wade was the only one that assumed he was some werewolf hybrid) but he still hadn’t expected this.

Once the cloak had left Moon Knight’s shoulders, his entire costume had completely disappeared with it; the dark, creepy mask, the glowing eyes, even the body suit. It all melted into moon light and slipped away from him like oil scattering away from water, as if it were allergic to him.

Wade stopped fighting for a moment, stunned into place. Large, soft and frightened brown eyes turned suddenly towards him and _holyshitthisguyisgorgeousohmygosh-_ Wade quickly dispatched the man who had carelessly caused the _coolest_ magical girl-like transformation Wade had ever seen, grabbing the cloak for good measure.

It was silky, soft, and seemed to pulse with a life of its own. He turned to give it to his companion, but Moony was busy taking care of the last dregs of the cult, not letting any scatter or run. The blood wasn’t avoiding him anymore, and he had an angry scowl etched into his really unnecessarily adorable face. Wade just enjoyed the show until it was over and Moon Knight turned towards him, his movements stiff and cautious. His expression was a dangerous kind of dark that both terrified Wade and also unfortunately did something entirely different and wildly more inappropriate. He shuffled uncomfortably in his suit as Moon Knight stalked towards him.

There was tension in every line of his body. Wade figured this cloak meant quite a bit to the guy, so he stepped forward and held it out to him. Gently, because who knew what kind of damage his grubby corpse hands could cause by touching something so precious. “Here’s your cloak, handsome- uh I mean partner.”

Moon Knight’s eyes widened, and his face went slightly slack with surprise. Did he not think Wade would give it back? Was it valuable? That could explain why the creepy cultist tried to steal it. Maybe it gave Moony his powers. Wouldn’t be the oddest circumstance Wade’s heard of.

But Moon Knight didn’t say anything, he just stared at the cloak in Wade’s hands. When he looked up to meet Wade’s eyes, he was blushing horribly. Wade didn’t have any idea at all what was going on but if he could see that expression at least once more he could probably die happy. (If he could die, that is.) But Moon Knight didn’t take the cloak.

“Uh, do you not want it back?”

The blush only got deeper, combined with what Wade assumed was supposed to be a scowl. Moon Knight opened his mouth, tried to say something but stumbled over it so he just shut his mouth and nodded. Wade had never been more confused in his life, but it was also probably the most positive social interaction he’d ever had so he wasn’t about to rush it.

Wade stepped closer and offered the cloak once more, but Moon Knight just shook his head and held up his hands in a plea for space, so Wade obliged. “I- I need to think about this.” And just like that, Moon Knight turned on his heel and disappeared, leaving Wade to deal with cleanup.

Still confused, Wade shook his head and looked at the cloak once more. It still shimmered in his hands and if he held it close enough to his ear he swore he could almost hear something ancient echoing within the trapped moon light that it was made of. He folded it carefully and held it against his chest.

“Hey Deadpool,” a familiar voice came from above. The creepy crawling web-slinger himself was balancing on the side of the alley he’d been walking past. “I just saw Moony without his cloak. Do you know what-”

Eight black eyes zeroed in on the cloak in his arms, and Spider-Man slowly crawled down his chosen wall, eight legs moving cautiously and in sync. “Wade, what are you doing with Marc’s cloak?”

Wade blinked. Did everyone know everybody else’s name except him or something? Wasn’t there like a code not to use them? Well, maybe not. It was kinda hard to hide things like being a giant spider, or a vampire, or a … whatever Marc apparently was. Human with a fancy cloak? “I was _trying_ to give it back to him.”

Peter stopped. “You were…” Wade watched as eight eyed executed a perfectly synchronized roll and Peter started climbing back up to whatever rooftop perch he’d chosen as his current home. “Stop goofing off, you flirt, Marc doesn’t need you messing with him like that.”

He disappeared over the top of the building before Wade could ask what he was talking about. Because, while yes, he was very much a flirt and the type to mess with people, Marc’s emotions regarding this cloak seemed very real and Wade wasn’t the type to try and destabilize someone further than they already were. It was a long climb out of there, and Wade of all people knew that.

What to do with the cloak though? He clearly had to give it back to Marc, especially if it was where he got his powers, but he’d run off! And it wasn’t like Wade knew where the Moon Cave was. Was there a Moon Cave? Wade was fairly certain there was a Spider Cave, but that didn’t mean every night stalking superhero had a cave. Just the eight-legged ones.

So Wade decided to go home and see if Marc came out and tried to fight crime tomorrow. It was likely, since the Moon would still be full, and he tended to be more active on days like that. If he couldn’t find him, he could always hunt down the Punisher. He seemed to be pretty buddy-buddy with Moony.

\---

It was far too early in the morning for any supernatural goons to be about when Wade heard a rather loud and insistent knock on his apartment door. He moaned.

“I’m dead, come back tomorrow.” It was a good pun, even if he overused it. The voices in his head snickered and Wade took it as his cue to snuggle back into his mound of pillows. He wasn’t Matt; he didn’t need to sleep in a coffin. He could pile all the pillows he wanted into his bed and no one could stop him.

Besides, being surrounded by the soft weight of the pillows was … nice. The only thing missing really was the body heat required to warm it. Wade tended to run cold more often than not nowadays.

The knocking grew louder and more ceaselessly obnoxious, so Wade grunted and crawled his way out of bed. He made sure to grab his mask so as not to terrify his early morning guest too much when he opened the door.

“Yeesh, don’t you know ghouls and creepers are a nocturnal species?” Wade snarked as he opened the door to a handsome older gentleman with a pencil mustache and a well-worn cane.

It was not someone Wade recognized. The hand the stranger wasn’t using to lean into the cane was lifted as if to continue knocking, and his eyes were piercing and accusatory. He was also human, and Wade _really_ didn’t know what to do with that. Especially since Wade’s experience with humans tended to lean more towards ‘screaming and running’ and less ‘friendly visiting neighbor’.

“Do you need sugar?” Wade asked, because his mouth had always been the fastest part of him and he’s too stupid to remember to keep it shut. The man just scowled, not at all surprised to see him. That meant he was probably not a neighbour? Or it was closer to Halloween than Wade remembered. Or maybe-

“You are Wade Wilson, correct?” the human asked. His voice had a smooth attractive quality to it, and a thick French accent that accumulated into something he couldn’t quite place but was teetering on the edge of familiar. But he'd never met the man before so Wade dismissed it. “This Deadpool that bothers all manner of night’s creatures?”

“The one and only.” Wade was still running through possible reasons for the human’s visit. He was starting to lean towards noise complaint when the man used his cane to shove at Wade’s chest, knocking him back from the door. Wade vaguely wondered what he did to earn this particular human’s ire, because he does Not look happy.

“You will give me the cloak right now or I will learn _very_ quickly how to dismember a self-healing corpse of a body until it sticks. Do you understand me?”

Wade’s fantasies ground to a halt as he remembered the more exciting aspects of the previous night; fighting side by side with Moony, getting to see his absolutely adorable _blushing_ face, the soft feel of liquid moonlight that was the cloak Marc had left with him. And this guy… he was after Marc’s cloak!

“No.” Wade said, maybe a little petulant. “I’m giving that back to Moony, you can’t have it.”

The man’s anger, which had been a force of its own to reckon with, seemed to putter out into confusion at that. Was it so hard to believe that Wade would stick out his neck for the other spooks? He may have been made by a mad scientist hell bent on taking over the world, but it wasn’t like the guy was a particularly good dad. And Wade wasn’t planning on following in his footsteps either.

“You,” the man lowered his cane, and instead turned his gaze around Wade’s humble and not at all trainwreck-y apartment, “want to return Marc’s cloak to him? Truly?”

His gaze turned back to Wade and swept up and down. The man was making a judgment about him and Wade couldn’t help but feel as if he was being found lacking. “Well, I’m not gonna let some stranger take it! How do I know you’re not part of that creepy cult we were fighting yesterday!”

The man’s face fell into a scowl once more. “Bah, you don’t know _anything_ .” Wade felt his hackles rise just a little, he knew _some_ things! “What could you possibly hope to provide? You’re practically strangers, you live in a home suitable only for a pig, you care not for yourself, and you expect me to give you my blessing? Marc deserves better than a corpse who got lucky with what he stole. Give me the cloak.”

“No. Yeesh, what kinda refusal do you need before you get outta here?” Wade rolled his eyes, grabbing one of his precious katanas off his back. “And okay yeah, I can hardly clean, but I’m a really good cook, and there’s at least one skill I’m good at.”

He flashed the blade, and the human took the hint. He stepped back towards the door. “If you have not returned his cloak by this time tomorrow, I will return, and it will not be without company. Marc may have mixed feelings about you, but I do not.”

“Wait, did he say anything about me? What were his exact words?” Wade could feel himself devolve into a teenage girl with a crush, but he couldn’t help it. Anyone would swoon at the sight of those soft brown eyes and those broad shoulders…

The man just scoffed, muttering to himself as he left. “…can cook indeed, bah.”

Wade waited until he was sure the man was out of the slightly rundown and ramshackle apartment building before he re-sheathed his katana and shook his head. “Guess he didn’t want sugar. Shame, he could have used the sweet to balance all those sour grapes he musta been eating.”

There weren’t any more incidents after that, so Wade finished getting ready for the day. After another cursory glance around his apartment, he decided that yeah okay maybe he could do a little housekeeping

By the time he was finished making his apartment look almost like a human could inhabit it, the pale full moon had risen. Wade figured it was as good a time as any to try and give back that cloak. And maybe see Moony blush again because that was at the top of his Halloween wish list.

The cloak was in a gun safe he’d bought some time ago for safe keeping. Not for his guns, mind, those were strewn across the apartment in various piles that were at least slightly more organized now than they had been during his impromptu visit. It was for actually valuable things that he didn’t want to get ruined or stolen. It opened with a click after he failed the combination six times.

The cloak was just as luminescent as Wade remembered it being. Molten silver, soft to the touch, almost completely weightless despite the thickness. Wade handled it gently, unwilling to sully it with his touch for too long, and slipped it into a knapsack he had lying around and cleaned out for this express purpose.

He would just carry it, but getting caught with it seemed to be an ongoing hot button issue and Wade would rather not get blood on it if one more person decided to make a comment, or take it from him before he could return it to its rightful owner.

Once he was ready, Wade headed out into the night. He was determined, he had a plan, and if people would stop mugging other people or trying to rob random mom and pop stores he might have succeeded rather early in the night. As it was, the sun was but a distant memory and Wade was starting to become frustrated.

He tried asking around for Moony, but it became pretty apparent pretty early on that no one had seen him. Was it because he didn’t have his magic cloak? That was just more of a reason for Wade to find him!

It was almost three in the morning when he ran into the Punisher on a random rooftop. Frank was laid out with a sniper rifle Wade was pretty sure he recognized from one of his wet dreams cause it was _gorgeous_ and he barely spared a glance Wade’s way before turning his attention back to the seemingly empty building in front of him.

Now Wade would normally enthusiastically engage in any number of conversations, but the last time he’d done so while Frank was waiting on a shot like this, it had ended with a rather large caliber bullet through his skull and a very pissy Frank for the week as he re-hunted his target.

Frank’s eye was focused on the scope when he spoke. “Heard you’re looking for Moon Knight,” Wade perked up. “You wouldn’t happen to be the reason he’s running around as Mr. Knight right now, would you?”

That was new info. “Mr. Knight?” Wade didn’t bother trying to disguise his interest. Everyone already knew he was dumb, it was not a stretch to think he wouldn’t know something even if others saw it as common knowledge.

Frank just rolled his eyes, but he didn’t seem overly concerned, so Wade wasn’t worried about him suddenly going all French guy on him. But he also didn’t answer Wade, so there was a distinct feeling that he was the butt end of a joke, and at least one of the voices in his head let him know exactly why that was.

“Who’s Mr Knight?”

“Marc has alters. Dissociative Identity Disorder. There’s more to him than just Marc and Moon Knight. Mr. Knight is the other mask, the one he doesn’t need the cloak for. More of a street crime guy than a big heroic type, he’s the one who joined up with the Midnight sons,” Frank answered quickly, like he was just waiting for the question. It was also the most Wade had ever heard him talk that wasn’t a long-winded tirade about why death was okay actually.

“Huh.” Wade didn’t really know what to do with that information. He knew a lot of the other caped crusaders tended to give a wider berth to Moony, despite the fact that some of them were objectively more terrifying than a guy with a magic cloak, but suddenly there was a different picture forming entirely in Wade’s head.

Maybe they could have something in common, as depressing as it seemed.

“Why-?” Frank apparently expected that question too because he turned his entire gaze on Wade. It was a pretty frightening thing to see from someone that was supposedly made from clay originally.

“I’m giving you the shovel talk. Right now, if you don’t think you can handle Marc at his worst, I don’t want you even trying. Marc has moments where it’s difficult for him to even know who he is, he struggles with visions that aren’t always real, and he’s unfortunately committed to the moon. If any of that seems like a bit much, I want you to hand over the cloak _right now_ , and not try and drag his heart through the mud.”

“…Marc isn’t a human with a fancy cloak, is he?” Wade asked, throwing out the one theory he had about Moony’s possible transformation a little desperately.

Frank just blinked. “You don’t know?”

Wade just shook his head, he’d gotten a …. a _shovel talk._ From the _Punisher_.

But instead of getting angry or accusatory, Frank just chuckled and went back to his scope. “Only Deadpool would _accidentally_ propose to a Selkie.”

A Selkie. Moony was a Selkie. Selkies considered themselves married to those they give their skin to. Wade had Marc’s _skin._ Wade had proposed to someone… and that someone hadn’t immediately said “No.” Marc Was A Selkie.

“He’s not a seal though?” Wade’s entire brain felt fried, was he engaged? That didn’t sound right, was that why the French guy was so mad? Was Wade engaged???!!!

“That’s a story to ask Marc, I wouldn’t get all the details right.” Then he rattled off an address in the nicer part of New York and said, “Go fix this, dumbass.”

Wade just nodded and jumped off the roof to hail a taxi. His legs were still healing when he heard a distinctive gunshot. Frank found his target. It left Wade wondering where Moony fell on the “Frank kills people” spectrum. Like, they were friends so he couldn’t be too against it? But then again Frank and Matt had like a whole thing and Matt was always super loud about his disapproval.

Wade was avoiding thinking about what he should really be thinking about because he didn’t know exactly what to do about the fact that he’d apparently unknowingly proposed to the cutest man in the world- who didn’t say no!- and everyone knew about it.

A taxi eventually pulled up to him and he crawled in, his legs almost fully healed. Should he just explain the situation? But what if he was giving up his only chance with the guy if he did that? But wouldn’t it be putting him into a corner if he _didn’t_ explain?

There wasn’t nearly enough time to come to a decision before the taxi was pulling up to a very large, very nice looking mansion that had Wade wondering exactly why someone who lived like _this_ had even entertained the idea of giving a long dead corpse like Wade half a chance.

He took one last look at the beautiful shifting silver of the cloak in his satchel before sighing, making his choice- it sucked- and walking to the front door.

It opened almost as soon as he knocked and a familiar pair of soft brown eyes almost knocked Wade over. _Oh, this just isn’t fair,_ he whined silently. So he focused on the small scar that cut through Marc’s left brow instead, because there was no way he wouldn’t immediately deflate if he kept trying to make eye contact. He’d already made his decision.

Marc was blushing again, but it was softer, more controlled. “Deadpool.”

Wade wanted to cry. Were selkies known to lure men to their deaths with just their voices? Or was that solely a siren thing? Because honestly if Marc asked him to drown himself in the ocean with that voice, Wade didn’t think he’d be able to refuse.

“I’m so sorry,” he said, wanting to get through this quickly. Rip it off like a band-aid. It was fine, he’d be fine. “I had no idea-”

He quickly took out the cloak. Careful. It was so important and Wade never should have been allowed to touch it-

“I had _no_ idea what I was doing I am so sorry you can have this back absolutely zero strings attached I was just trying to be friendly, not that I wouldn’t marry you because I mean you’re absolutely beautiful and I love your sense of humor you remember that time you punched a guy and said ‘knight knight’? ‘Cause I still think about that sometimes and-”

Wade was forced to stop his rambling because Marc had forced both of his hands over Wade’s mouth, his face a very deep shade of red and his eyes wide in a slightly twisted expression that made Wade think that if he licked the hands covering his mouth as instinct demanded, he’d probably yelp.

Shame the mask got in the way, but as it was he simply stopped talking and waited for Marc to slowly calm and lower his hands.

“Please stop.” Marc almost looked like he was wincing, and Wade nodded. He was pretty used to embarrassing himself at this point, so what if he was doing it in front of his current crush? That was just par for the course. Not that he’d ever played golf.

Wade just pressed the cloak into Marc’s newly freed hands and stepped back. “So, uh, yeah-”

But before he could get too far, a strong, calloused grip around his wrist stopped him. Wade turned back, surprised. Usually people didn’t stop him from leaving.

“Dinner?”

Wade just blinked. “What?”

Marc’s blush was back full force, and he was definitely avoiding eye contact. “I’m free if you ever want to get dinner.”

It sounded like he was fighting to get the words out, and Wade felt his heart skip a beat once he registered exactly what those words were. It almost sounded- “Like a date?”

The only response was a single sharp nod and Wade could feel himself squeal.

“That’s perfect! I’ll have you know I am an _excellent_ chef! What are your favorite foods, no wait, let me guess, is it pancakes? I hope it’s pancakes because I can make some of the best, fluffiest, most delicious pancakes-”

There was a soft smile on Marc’s face. “You know I can afford a restaurant, right?”

Wade just grinned. “Where’s the fun in that?”

He was, after all, quite a good cook.

**Author's Note:**

> Happy Halloween!! I know this fic isnt exactly scary or anything but I had it ruminating in my head for a while and thought it would be perfect for for a little themed work. Hope you like it. 
> 
> Dedicated to my friend in the MK discord: damwords. You rock.


End file.
